IHOP (International House of Prayer) is NOT of God.

This is my Testimony:

I grew up as the only Christian in my household. My parents came to know Jesus when I was about 10. My Father began to backslide after his grandmother died which took a pretty big toll on his relationship with my brothers, my mother, and I. Off and on since I was in about 7th grade, I had severe night terrors and nightmares. I attended a Bible High School as well as a Bible College after I graduated. I often tried to find a reason and a way to stop my night terrors, with little to no answers. Meanwhile, my family was extremely rocky to say the least. My dad was an absentee, my youngest brother was abusive, and my mom was enabling them both. I always wanted to help them, but neglected myself in the process. Wanting to get closer to the Lord, I decided to go to an extension campus in Hawaii (without praying about it and for pretty selfish reasons). I knew I probably wasn’t supposed to go but went anyway to escape from everything else going on in my life. The Pastor who ran the campus quit 3 days before our arrival and a local apprentice to the pastor was put in charge and (very) reluctantly took the position. It was a pretty messed up situation, to which I and everyone else on campus (about 20 people) ended up leaving as a result. At this point, my walk was very dry and I felt so out of place no matter where I was. I just needed a place I felt I could fit in and, at the same time, draw closer to the Lord and get some answers for weird things that would happen (like the night terrors).

Then a friend told me about the International House of Prayer (IHOP). I heard that my favorite band was going to play at their “One Thing Conference” in December. I decided to go, for three reasons:
1. To meet the friend who told me about IHOP
2. To see my favorite band
3. Hopefully get closer to the Lord and find some answers to my questions

At this time, I had absolutely no experience in anything the Charismatic church teaches and was clueless about manifestations, deliverance ministry, baptism of the Holy Spirit, etc. At the same time, I was very desperate to be loved and accepted by God and by people, and I was desperate to feel anything. I felt so dry and empty. I just needed someone to be there for me and understand… I needed Jesus.

SO I went to the conference and had some very different experiences. I heard people speak in tongues for the first time. People talked about Angels and Demons like it was a normal every day experience, and I heard doctrines that I’d never heard before. I was also told that all the other churches in America were dead, dry, and boring and were, therefore, without Jesus. Because my walk was dead, dry, and boring, it seemed right to me. And the experiences I had that weekend, although strange to me, felt good and exciting. Because of the conference, I decided that I wanted to go to FSM, in hopes of finding Jesus and acceptance there.

I attended IHOP/FSM and was heavily involved for about 3+ years. My first semester there, I had nothing but good things to say about IHOP because I was still learning all these new things that I found to be fascinating, and I felt I was accepted by everyone else who was “just like me.” I also thought I found answers to my night terrors, when they explained it was because I “had demons” that needed to be delivered. After going through several of their deliverance ministries, however, the terrors only got worse and more frequent.

It wasn’t until my second semester (after going home for Christmas break) that I realized I had completely disconnected from my family, friends, and reality. All of my closest friends and family members sat me down (individually) for an intervention, of sorts. They would tell me things like that I’ve changed and I seemed happy and “on-fire” for God, but that something was off and something was wrong. And when I would tell them some of the things I was learning or experiencing, they only became more worried and they confronted me with scriptures, which got me thinking. So going back into my second semester, I was a lot more confused and had a lot more questions.

Slowly but surely, the Lord chipped away at my heart and showed me very clear scriptures to cause me to question the things that would go on there. After realizing this, I started feeling really weird about some things that were being done and said there, so I took it to the Lord, as any “Berean” should. I started looking up the scriptures my teachers would give us in handouts to explain some of their doctrines, and I realized that not one of those scriptures had anything to do with those doctrines. They were either taken completely out of context or just had nothing at all to do with what the doctrine was (ie: deliverance, manifestations, etc). So, I became even more confused and concerned. I started asking very genuine questions about where certain things were in scripture (like deliverance ministry, false prophesies, manifestations, etc.) because I wanted to be sure that I was doing the right thing in God’s eyes. I just wanted it to be explained to me because I didn’t understand the doctrines and I didn’t understand why the scriptures weren’t lining up with my experiences. When everyone would “feel the presence of God” or everyone would “break out into manifestations of God,” I wouldn’t feel anything and I would almost never experience what everyone else did. So, most days, I felt like an outsider because everyone but me was “getting it.” I started feeling confused and rejected by God, which is why (again), I turned to scripture.

I noticed that, when I started asking questions, that I had been “red flagged.” What I mean is that I had particular people in leadership following me around and keeping tabs on me. I was moved out of my core “Omega” group and into one with Sabrina Walsh who was a former, practicing witch and was also a leader at FSM. She and her husband were in charge of the “Signs and Wonders” classes where they teach kids how to prophesy and perform miracles. I was put in the group because I was to be “monitored.” After changing groups, I began having strange dreams and getting attacked on almost a daily basis.

As I read more scripture, I also began to realize that much of what they were teaching and practicing was extremely unbiblical and even dangerous. We were constantly fasting and in the prayer room. After starting to eat more and going to the prayer room a little less, I felt my head start to clear up and I didn’t like what I was seeing and how I felt. I often went back and forth, in my mind, between wanting to feel what everyone else felt, and realizing that it wasn’t from God, trying to figure it out. Half-way through my third year of school, I was brought into a room with several staff members (including Walsh) who accused me of many things that I hadn’t even come close to doing and they said something to the effect of:

“We know that you have father issues that need to be resolved (I didn’t) and we can tell that you are heavily oppressed by many demons. However, we are incapable of this level of deliverance on someone. We just don’t have the time or the resources. So we are going to send you to this wonderful place in Toronto, Canada. This rehabilitation facility is capable of handling your type of situation. We’ve sent many students there who have come back completely delivered. We are going to send you there. You cannot come back to IHOP or FSM until we have a written letter from them stating that you have been delivered. In the current state you are in, you’re a danger to the other student’s growth and spiritual being.”

…To which I told them I would certainly go, but had no intention of actually going. I said I would go because I was very much afraid of what would happen if I told them I wouldn’t go, and was afraid until I moved back home. After the meeting with them, I immediately called my Dad, who I’d been told not to talk to anymore because he said IHOP was a cult. At one point, they also told me that I needed to stay away from my mom (who is my best friend in the world) because she had demons and was pulling me away from God (which was anything but true). My Dad booked the first flight to Kansas City. At that time, my mom and I owned a home in KC and we had been helping students that went to FSM by providing rooms with low rent. I had an excellent relationship with each person in the house. Within two weeks of being pulled into the office ALL of my roommates – my friends - moved out. When asked directly, they either had no response or told me that the school had told them it was an “unsafe environment” because I and my mother “had a demon”.

I was absolutely crushed. All I ever wanted was to know God and at the time I felt completely rejected by Him. When I finally left IHOP, I was not all the way better. I was actually worse than when I started because I was more confused, felt rejected, and still needed help. My head felt like it was covered in a fog. I would constantly go back and forth between “I know what happened was wrong” and “God was the one taking me out of there to save me” all the way to “IHOP was right” and “there is something wrong with me.” Like I said, I was a complete mess and it took a whole lot of love and prayer to get me out of that state of mind. I even flew to Illinois to go to my friend’s church (the same one who told me about IHOP in the first place) to try to get “Delivered” of this demon that IHOP told me about because I was so messed up. After that trip, I walked away from the Lord completely for about 6 months and was absolutely miserable both in and out of the church.

It wasn’t until I came back to my Calvary Chapel church that life started to become normal again. Even then, it took a really long time. I was able to let go of needing to feel something that wasn’t there and just focus on the truth of the Word of God and loving and understanding who God is. He is never-changing, always loving, arms-wide open, ever wise, ever beautiful, ever strong, amazing, orderly, and truthful God. He is my best friend, my Father, my peace, and my joy. And it didn’t take barking like a dog, falling over, being “drunk,” or being “delivered” from a “demon,” to do it. It was straight-up surrendering to His will and letting go of mine. It was repentance and it was loving God, even if it seems “Boring.” It was just worshipping at his feet, reading His word, fellowship with believers, accountability, etc… going back to the basics. The gospel is truly simple and God is very straight-forward. He is not the author of confusion.
I thank God for my Calvary Chapel pastor back home (and the amazing women at my church) who spent every minute praying for me, speaking life over me, and bringing me back to the truth of the Word of God. I almost lost faith and hope many times. But God is so amazing…He spared my life and got me out of there.

I grieve for the people I love who are still stuck within the lies of IHOP and for the many who are recruited to IHOP daily. I pray for their souls and I pray for the truth to be made known to them. If ever there was an “antichrist spirit,” this is it.

I’ve kept all of my journals, notes, books, and materials from when I was there. When looking back on the things I wrote and the things I would say…it’s like I was a mindless drone who repeated everything I heard. It scares me to think that so many people are being deceived, so many families ripped apart…so many lives destroyed….and all in the name of “Jesus”. God help us and God forgive those who tarnish and blaspheme Your name!

If you have any questions, feel free to email me: Delilahdias@yahoo.com

Deliverance Ministry: Work of God or ploy of Demons?

The first topic I would like to discuss is what most Charasmatics call the "Deliverance Ministry." Now I've noticed that this is a subject that isn't touched on very often. If you're Charismatic, you probably believe its a must-have in the ministry, otherwise you probably don't even know what it is. While every Deliverance Ministry is slightly different in how they operate and what they believe should and shouldn't be done, there is one underlying belief that makes all Deliverance Ministry what it is. Just for reference, my experience with this particular form of ministry has been through the Vineyard and through IHOP-KC with Mike Bickle. I warn you in advance that this blog is long but it has to be long in order that I am thorough on the subject. That being said, let's begin

What is Deliverance Ministry?
Simply put, it is an elaborate form of exorcism. The big difference being that the people with the supposed demons are professed and practicing Christians. Furthermore, the only way to rid yourself of these supposed demons are by confessing, renouncing, and repenting each and every individual sin and involvement in occult or other ungodly things, in order to have the spiritual strength to break off the power of demon, who will, in most cases, just come and attach itself back to you. They call these “familiar spirits.” {Scripturally, though, familiar spirits only possess and are used by necromancers.} Most people have to have others pray for them in fear that they will manifest the demon. Not only must they confess, renounce, and repent from all their own sins and involvements but also for all of their family’s sins too (up to ten generations back). And on top of all of those things, they also have to break off any word curses than others may have spoken over them. {Wow, that’s a lot of work for someone who was supposed to be set free (indeed) at the cross, isn’t it?} While some Deliverance Ministries (DM) say that believers can actually be possessed by demons, most believe that believers cannot be possessed (in their body) but only oppressed. Sounds good, right? Well, wait until you hear what oppressed means, by their definition. First of all, the word “oppressed” means the same as “possessed” in the scripture. There is no distinction. Second of all, though they will tell you that believers cannot be possessed, when you read the fine print you’ll discover that they do, in fact, believe that a true believer in Christ can manifest demons. So how is that any different than possession? Lets find out.

Beware of the Devil’s tactics
Since the charismatic church makes such a huge deal about their Deliverance ministry, you would think it would be in the Bible at least once. I assure you, it’s not. I could almost finish this article right here. If that doesn’t say enough I really don’t know what will. As Christians, we are warned time and time again to test all things because false doctrine is everywhere.

The reason I urge you to be careful to test everything with the utmost caution is because it’s very easy to fall into a false doctrine. Satan is a professional liar and has been doing it for over 6,000 years. He will even use scriptures. Typically, the enemy likes to fool you by giving you a whole bunch of truths and mixing it in and twisting it with a little bit of lie; Very sneaky to the undiscerning eye. You see examples of this all throughout scripture, especially when tempting Jesus. If you have a glass that is 99% water and 1% rat poison, no matter how you look at it, the contents of the glass are still poison and will kill you. It is exactly the same with false doctrine. So as we continue, watch out for those partial truths.

What they will tell you

Now, what every DM has in common is they will all start out by telling you:

“You are a triune being - BODY, SOUL and SPIRIT. Your SOUL is your MIND, WILL and EMOTIONS.”

This statement is very true. How is this relevant to the deliverance ministry? Well, they will tell you how each of those three parts are or aren’t affected by the demonic FOR CHRISTIANS. They will tell you:

“First is your BODY. Christians can have a sickness/disease just like the unsaved.”

This is also very true. But here’s where they begin to throw in their own two sense, they will tell you that your sickness is “caused by demons (if not caused by other factors).” They will, of course give you scriptures such as: Matthew 4:24, 8:16, 10:8, Mark 1:32, 1:34, 6:13, etc. So you may or may not be thinking something like, “Well, we do have three parts (body, soul, spirit), and we do get sick. There are also demons, and there are even scriptures that talk about demons and sickness, so what’s your point?” READ the scriptures listed. Even do your own search for scriptures involving sickness and the demonic. They are, in fact, listed together but as very separate things with words like “and,” “or,” etc. between them in a LIST of other things.

These scriptures, in no way, support that sickness is caused by demons. In fact, didn’t the disciples assume a similar thing when they asked Jesus (John 9:1-3), " Rabbi, who sinned, this man or his parents, that he should be born blind? " What was Jesus’ response? Jesus clearly answered by saying, "It was not that this man or his parents sinned, but he was born blind in order that the workings of God should be manifested (displayed and illustrated) in him." So clearly, sin has nothing to do with sickness, nor does it have to do with possession. Even IF this were true, this still doesn’t even address the underlying issue: can Christians have demons and/or are they in need of deliverance from demonic?

Let us move on to the next thing they will tell you:

“The second part of your triune self is your SOUL.”

Again, this statement is very true. Humans do, in fact, possess a soul. How is this relevant to deliverance ministry? They will tell you something like this:

“Do you have a bad temper? That's a demon. Is there mental illness in your family background? That is a demon. Do you have trouble serving God? That's a demon. Do you have problems with bad thoughts? That is a demon.”

Scripture in support of these accusations? None. This is why I say you MUST be careful. It is so easy to be fooled if you are simply following their bunny trail of logical fallacies. However, if you are testing every part of this by scripture, you will not be fooled so easily. Even without using scripture you can make logical conclusions, if you’re paying attention:

Is it true that someone who is possessed by a demon acts as though they are mentally ill (cutting themselves, screaming profanities, attacking other people, convulsions, etc)? Absolutely. Does that mean Auntie May is demonically possessed or oppressed because they suffer from something like Epilepsy or depression? Definitely not.

Can someone who is oppressed, without any kind of possession, have their minds controlled by a demon? No way on this planet or otherwise! It’s not even a possibility.

Is it true that people who are possessed by a demon can have outbursts of wrath and physically hurt people? Of course! Does this mean that Tiny Tim with the bad temper is possessed or oppressed by demons? No. Does he lack self-control? Definitely, but that, in NO way, means he’s possessed or oppressed by demons, both in the logical sense and Biblically speaking. Is it true that the enemy can be allowed (with God’s permission) to afflict us physically? Yes, look at Job and Paul. Does this mean you have a demon or need deliverance? NO. Neither Job nor Paul went through renouncing prayers. Job and Paul, rather, trusted in God because God’s grace was sufficient.

The Hook, Line, and Sinker

Now for the last part of the three, the DM will say: “Third is your SPIRIT. Demons cannot get into your SPIRIT, but, the demons surround your SPIRIT like a glass jar surrounds its contents, and you have trouble serving the Lord JESUS the way the bible tells you to do or that you want. The contents of the jar cannot get out until you remove the lid (demons). Deliverance can get rid of the demons.” What do you even say to that?! I mean besides, “heresy!” (hehe).

Wow. When you look at their argument broken up like this, it seems awfully ridiculous, doesn’t it? You can probably begin seeing how believing these things could be somewhat catastrophic to a believer. It would be torturous to think you will never be free from demons controlling you and making it so you can’t serve God. Sounds like an excellent way to take responsibility off of you and put it on to the enemy. This kind of Deliverance ministry is not only massively deceptive but it causes CHRISTIANS to walk around in unnecessary bondage. The worst part of the whole thing is that some people see very temporary results from the Deliverance sessions not realizing that simply by buying into the doctrine, they are putting themselves into unnecessary bondage. They claim you receive freedom through the DM (because apparently Christ’s work on the cross wasn’t enough), however, they also say its something that needs to be done constantly for the whole of your Christian walk. But what about Jesus? I thought that if I died to myself and was born again unto Him, He would set me free by His blood. Apparently not. They will tell you, “[The Demon’s] right to remain may be technically voided since the territory is under new control, but that doesn't mean they leave automatically or give up easily. An offense must be mounted to enforce the terms of victory. The exorcist must diligently pursue every avenue of deliverance to be certain that every demonic influence has been conquered (Larson, Bob).

Wow…. So…. God isn’t enough? Um….

Also beware because if they can’t get you to buy into the DM by what they say, they’ll try to convince you to believe through experiential testimony or having you watch a DM session where people will “manifest” and people will claim healing from something they were initially unaware of. BUT, just because something is real does NOT mean it is from God. Be watchful and discerning. You don’t always see the whole picture. When I was first involved in the DM, I was in constant torment because instead of putting the former things behind, I had to constantly re-visit my and my family’s past to make sure I “got rid of all those demons” that were supposedly oppressing me through sickness, trial, generational curses, etc. What I didn’t realize is that simply through buying into this doctrine, I was giving the enemy a foothold and an authority in my life that he wouldn’t otherwise have. I was never even sick or anything before getting involved in the DM but as soon as I began to buy into the deception, I was constantly sick and depressed. Worse than that, I wasn’t truly believing in the power behind Jesus’ Name and the work He finished on the cross. The DM puts more faith and more focus in and on the demonic being able to control you than it does God’s Word and God’s ability to set you free once and for all. The DM not only puts you into bondage but there is absolutely no scriptural origin whatsoever. While exorcism (casting out one or more demons in a possessed non-Christian) is very biblical, Deliverance Ministry is entirely unbiblical. Speaking of the Bible, lets turn to the scriptures and see what they have to say.

What the Bible Says
This could literally take all day, so I will try to sum this up as best as possible.

First of all, let me say that just because something is real does NOT mean it’s from God. If you’re putting more faith in a deliverance ministry (as a Christian) because you believe you’re possessed or oppressed for whatever reason, than you are in God’s Word and His work through Christ, then we have a serious problem here. That, in it of itself, is usually the underlying cause of very real demonic manifestations. In order to be born again, you must first put all your faith, hope, and trust in God. Then you pick up your cross, die to yourself and flesh, thus being born of the spirit. If you’re manifesting a demon, you need to take a serious look at yourself and examine whether or not you’re really even a born-again Christian. If you’re putting your faith in a deliverance ministry, you’re not putting your faith in God. Allow me to briefly explain what I mean through scripture.

First scripture we’ll look at is John 8:31-38 –

“So Jesus said to the Jews who had believed in Him, ‘If you abide in My word, you are truly My disciples, and you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.’ They answered Him, ‘We are offspring of Abraham and have never been enslaved to anyone. How is it that You say, you will become free?’ Jesus answered them, ‘Truly, truly, I say to you, everyone who commits sin is a slave to sin. The slave does not remain in the house forever; the son remains forever. So if the Son sets you free, you will be free indeed. I know that you are offspring of Abraham; yet you seek to kill me because my word finds no place in you. I speak of what I have seen with my Father, and you do what you have heard from your father.’" Then Jesus goes into more detail as to what He means on the issue.

I think Jesus has made Himself very clear. If you’re living in sin, you’re in bondage as a slave to sin. If the Son (Jesus) has set you free, then you are absolutely, entirely, wholly free once and for all. The amplified Bible says you are “really and unquestionably free.” That is very cut and dry. You don’t become a slave to your master once you’ve already been set free. You’re either free or slave. Therefore, it is more than safe to say that if Christ has truly set you free from sin, you need no more deliverance than the cross on Calvary.

The second scripture we’ll look at is in Acts 13:38-39 –

"Let it be known to you therefore, brothers, that through this Man forgiveness of sins is proclaimed to you, and by Him everyone who believes is freed from everything from which you could not be freed by the law of Moses.”

This verse makes it even more clear to us that if you believe in Jesus, you then will be freed from everything that the law can not free you from. The amplified bible tells us that those who believe are “absolved (cleared and freed) from every charge from which he could not be justified and freed by the Law of Moses and given right standing with God.” So then, if we are made in right standing with God, now being sons and not orphans, then I think it safe to say the past sins and the past altogether are irrelevant to God in terms of judgment and curse. The slate is wiped clean. Now, this doesn’t clear us from consequence such as losing a limb from a mistake or catching aids from sleeping around, etc. However, it frees us from the curse of sin and since these supposed demons are there due to sin, they flee from God’s presence. For where there is light there can be NO darkness. Not to say that God can’t or won’t heal you because He can. But that’s another topic entirely.

Though there are thousands more scriptures I could point out, for sake of space and time, the last scripture we’ll look at is in Romans 6. Really Romans 6 as a whole, but we’ll look at Romans 6:6-7, 14 –

“We know that our old self was crucified with him in order that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin. For one who has died has been set free from sin…. For sin will have no dominion over you, since you are not under law but under grace.”

Now pair this up with how Jesus says we are to be saved in John chapter 3 and we have our clear answer right here. If you are truly saved, you are free. For where the Spirit of the Lord is there is freedom (2 Corinthians 3:17). You cannot tell me that God sent His Son to come humble Himself in meekness to be spit on, made fun of, bloodied, bruised, and hung on a cross just to set a part of us free! He came to set us free indeed! To set us completely and wholly free! Each and every part of us being in submission to God and Christ, is set free the moment we become His.

Need or dare I say more? I think not. The scripture speaks for itself. To contradict this is to say that the sacrifice on the cross was not enough to set you free, in which case you really aren’t saved. Truth be told, His blood is enough. That’s that.

In the Name of Jesus: A reality or an incantation?

This is going to be my first blog of many and one of the most important. It will be something repeated over and again and it will be my main reference point. I say this because, above all else, I am adamant about keeping things Biblical. With all the false doctrines today that are ruining people’s lives and robbing people of their souls, keeping things completely biblical and testing all things through scripture should be everyone’s number one focus. Paul the apostle seems to agree. That being said, let’s get started.

When learning about doctrines, ministries, or anything that is taught from the pulpit, it is very important to remember two things:

1. We must test all things. We (obviously) are supposed to use the Bible to test doctrines and ministries. Therefore, if it isn’t in the Bible, it isn’t from God. I think that should seriously go without saying. However, Bible reading Christians still fall victim to false doctrines every day. Sadly, many of these false doctrines lead to the demise of otherwise whole-hearted Christians.

2. Just because something is real does not mean it’s from God. For example, witchcraft is very real. However, witchcraft is most definitely not from or approved by God because it is a work of the Devil. Witchcraft can even be done in the context of a church service (aware of it or not) but it is obviously not of God.

Here’s the snag that gets a lot of people in trouble: Even if something is done having said “by the blood” or “in the name of Jesus” does not, by any means, mean that it is from God. There are many false Christ’s and by merely saying “in the name of Jesus” or “by the blood” does not mean anything at all. They are just words. It’s not some fancy spiritual incantation that you can say and things will be done for you. When Jesus said to “do this in My name,” He did not mean to literally say “in the Name of Jesus” at the end of your prayer. When someone tells you to do something in their name, it means by their character. For example, slaughtering Jews could be done in the name of Hitler or in the name of Nazi Germany but it definitely could not be done in the name of Jesus. Make sense? So when Jesus says “Do this in My Name.” He did not mean to use the literal words “in the Name of Jesus” as some sort of incantation, but to actually do as He would do.

It’s very important to mention this because the Devil is an expert counterfeiter; he’s been doing it for thousands of years. He even uses the scriptures to try and fool us and cause us to turn from God. Do not be fooled into thinking that the Devil won’t do everything in his power to kill God’s beloved. He even used scripture, the very Word of God, to try and fool Jesus into worshipping him instead of the true and living God in Matthew 4. The Devil will stop at nothing and he will even twist scripture, which is why it is of the utmost importance that we diligently test everything.

For some reason people think that by merely quoting scripture or singing songs about Jesus, the Devil flees from the room and is found powerless against you. While we absolutely have power, through Christ, over sin, death, and the Devil, it takes a lot more than simple words and songs to find victory. Just quoting scripture alone means nothing, they are just words. Those scriptures have to actually be alive in your heart; those words have to be a reality in order to speak with boldness and power. You can’t move mountains without faith and you certainly can’t defeat the devil with empty words. If the scriptures are not alive in your heart, if they are not a reality in your life and you speak them to try and defeat the works of darkness, you have turned those words and scriptures into powerless incantations. Does this make sense, I hope?

Let me give you one more example from real life and then I’ll end this: One night I had a demon wake me up to try and scare me. He shook my bed, made a lot of noise, and the whole bit. I had never seen a demon before so I was pretty terrified. I began to say, “In the name of Jesus, get out of here! Leave me alone in Jesus’ name!” I didn’t exactly get the reaction I was hoping for. Instead of leaving, he started to scare me even more. This lasted for about half an hour before he finally went away. As I lay in my bed crying, I asked the Lord what I did wrong. I said, “in the name of Jesus,” why didn’t he go away? The Lord gave me a dream that night (it was still only 3am) where He explained to me what went wrong. He gave me 1 John 4:18 (AMP),

“There is no fear in love [dread does not exist], but full-grown (complete, perfect) love turns fear out of doors and expels every trace of terror! For fear brings with it the thought of punishment, and [so] he who is afraid has not reached the full maturity of love [is not yet grown into love's complete perfection].”

This makes so much sense. God taught me something that should have been obvious. Merely saying “in Jesus Name” means nothing. They are just words. If I am commanding a demon to leave in the name of Jesus but I’m saying it in fear, then the words are powerless because I do not really believe in the power behind His name. Perfect love casts out fear. If I really believed that God is who He says He is and that God is on my side, then a stupid little demon couldn’t scare me if he tried. That demon may as well be the boogeyman. However, if I am afraid of a demon, then I do not really know God because God is much bigger than the boogeyman! Hahaha. Seriously though, the enemy doesn’t even come close to touching God.

The point is, words are meaningless and powerless without the true reality of them living in your heart and through your life. As in the days of old until now, God looks at your heart not your words. Let this be a lesson learned and lived by.

Coming up!

I am currently working on an extensive in-depth chain of blogs that will be very interesting to most of you. They will deal with many things including but not limited to: my experiences at ihop and with the charasmatic church; false doctrines; false teachers; bible studies; things to be aware of as a christian; how to be wise among a fallen church and among a church teaching and practicing false-doctrines; etc.

You really wont want to miss these and I would love nothing more that to have discussions opened up through these blogs. These will take careful thought, prayer, and research, so please be patient while waiting for new posts.

Also PLEASE let me know if there are any specific topics you would like me to write on. That would be great.

Thanks and God bless!
Stephanie

Sleeping Beauty

{Just kinda wrote itself one day...}

Around and round

The world is spinning

Time is ticking, ticking.

Just another day

Another way to sin

You wear deception like a cloak.

Eyes ajar to mere shadow

A life so dim you fail to see

Lost, confused, no glimmer of hope

Wake! Awake, oh sleeper!

He is coming!

Didn't you know?

Haven't you heard?

He said He'd be back.

Wake! Awake, oh sleeper!

Arise from your slumber.

Jesus is here to reclaim His own.

Though they cry peace the war isn't over

It has only just begun to conquer

You sleep 'midst the shriek of battle

Drawing closer and closer

The foeman at your door

The sky is falling, falling.

The King is coming, coming.

Open your eyes

Death lurks all around

The beat of the song

Growing louder and louder

Quickly choose who you are for.

Are you prepared?

His foot is out the door

Awake! Awake!

Jesus is near!

He is Here! Awake!

I can hear the rhythm

It's the Lion of the tribe of Judah

Though His heart aches with desire

His eyes are a flame of fire

Drenched in blood are His clothes

For this time He's come to transpose.

You must heed to the beat of His song

As its melody rises with the dawn…

Sheilds are raised

Swords are drawn

Thunder cracks

Here He comes

Blood is spilt

There's no more time

You should've listened

You should have come

You chose to sleep

You became numb

You've played the harlot

You played the fool

God will not be mocked

The earth is His footstool

Though the battle's just begun

It is already won

I'm taken at the final chord

"Victory!" says my Lord,

"Victory is Mine!"

But you'll be here to see the dawn

When all will be judged without pardon

Every sin, every thought and crime

His wrath will fall on all

The end of time.

Violent Love

I just thought of something....

You know when you are perfectly and incandescently happy and in-love with someone? It doesn't matter what ANYONE says, you love them and you are going to be with them no matter what it takes. Right? More than that, this person says "jump" and its your every pleasure to do so for them. They want to move away to another state, you're there! No matter what. Your friends and family could give you every reason not to, even to the point of disowning you but it matters not because you are fantastically in love with this person. Right? You would do anything at all for them and even more just to be with them and keep them in your life, loving you back. Even to death, in most cases. Isn't that right? Very real love is such a violent thing, isn't it?

But this poses just one question for me: Why aren't we like this with God?!

Ahh, well God is love, is He not? But more than that, we claim to be perfectly in love with Him, even to the point of death. However, our hearts and our actions have something very different to say. You see, because words mean absolutely nothing unless your heart follows. Where your treasure is, there your heart is also, right? Well, is our treasure really in God? We say it is. We'd like to think it is. But is it really? Why do we say we love God but do not act like it? Why do we say we love God and yet still insist on having our own way as if entitled to anything at all? Truth be told, if we really loved God, if we were truly Christians, then we lost our lives at the cross and are no longer desiring anything for ourselves but to give everything inside of us to loving God and glorifiying His Name.

But that's not how we live is it? So are we really Christians then? Do we even love God at all? I don't know. That's something you will need to figure out between you and God.

This life is nothing. God is everything. What kind of love is this that would say, "your sin is Mine, I'll take it to the grave." And yet we give Him nothing. We can offer Him no less than all of our lives, and that isnt even enough, but its all He wants. He is so for real. He has given everything. But we can't even give up an hour of TV for Him. Or whatever it may be. He asks for ALL of us, but we can't even give Him an hour of this meaningless life. So again, I ask you, are we really even Christians at all? Seeing how Christian implies you be like Christ, I'd be willing to say that most times we are not. Not in this culture. Not if we live just like this world. I mean, we have everything already, what do we need God for? Do we really love Him? Or do we love ourselves and think that a prayer to say "sorry" is going to "get us to Heaven"?? Well it doesn't work that way. Why? Because God has said, "The kingdom of Heaven suffers violence and the violent take it by force (Mt 11:12)." The love of God is a very violent thing. The wisdom and the love of God was to put His very Son on the cross. What do you think He will do to you then? If He didn't even spare His own Son, what will He do to those who claim Christ with their mouths and yet live every moment to reject and rebel against Him by living for themselves, when they've claimed to die?! Wow.....It isn't about gifts, works, words, or any of those things. It isn't about how well we know scipture compared to the next, it isn't about preaching or teaching or how "spiritual" we percieve ourselves to be. It's about actually loving God and loving others to the fullest extent. It isn't even about us. Its about Him.

Love is a very violent thing. Do we really love God, or do we just say we do because we think that's what will save us? wow....

In the words of King David...

Psalm 27(AMP):

"THE LORD is my Light and my Salvation--whom shall I fear or dread? The Lord is the Refuge and Stronghold of my life--of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked, even my enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell. Though a host encamp against me, my heart shall not fear; though war arise against me, [even then] in this will I be confident. One thing have I asked of the Lord, that will I seek, inquire for, and [insistently] require: that I may dwell in the house of the Lord [in His presence] all the days of my life, to behold and gaze upon the beauty [the sweet attractiveness and the delightful loveliness] of the Lord and to meditate, consider, and inquire in His temple. For in the day of trouble He will hide me in His shelter; in the secret place of His tent will He hide me; He will set me high upon a rock. And now shall my head be lifted up above my enemies round about me; in His tent I will offer sacrifices and shouting of joy; I will sing, yes, I will sing praises to the Lord. Hear, O Lord, when I cry aloud; have mercy and be gracious to me and answer me! You have said, 'Seek My face [inquire for and require My presence as your vital need].' My heart says to You, 'Your face (Your presence), Lord, will I seek, inquire for, and require [of necessity and on the authority of Your Word].' Hide not Your face from me; turn not Your servant away in anger, You Who have been my help! Cast me not off, neither forsake me, O God of my salvation! Although my father and my mother have forsaken me, yet the Lord will take me up [adopt me as His child]. Teach me Your way, O Lord, and lead me in a plain and even path because of my enemies [those who lie in wait for me]. Give me not up to the will of my adversaries, for false witnesses have risen up against me; they breathe out cruelty and violence. [What, what would have become of me] had I not believed that I would see the Lord's goodness in the land of the living! Wait and hope for and expect the Lord; be brave and of good courage and let your heart be stout and enduring. Yes, wait for and hope for and expect the Lord."

Amen.